Merry Christmas

Finally, its the day of Christmas. I have been doing a bit of shopping the past week, listening to some Christmas song on the radio everyday, and also a few party/ gathering with friends. To tell you the truth, it really didn't feel like Christmas. It feels like any other holiday of the year. They sing "Its the most wonderful time of the year...." in the radio, but what's so wonderful about it? Because you get to shop for discount price? You get to receive presents? You get to have a holiday and party with friends? Why are we so happy or joyful in Christmas? What's the real meaning of Christmas?

I didn't feel the joy of Christmas until the Christmas worship this morning. We sang a lot of Christmas song. We went through the passage of Jesus' birth in the bible Luke Chapter 2. We talked about this every year. Christmas is not about Santa Claus, shopping, or party. Its the birthday of Jesus Christ. Its about God sending his only son to be with us, to go through all the struggle we face, and give us the peace in life. That's why Christianity is so powerful, because God came to us and experience all the troubles in life Himself. At the end of the service, they passed around the mic for everyone to share their blessing from God in the past year. Most of the people who shared are from the English ministry. I think if they did this in the Chinese worship, 90% of the people will not share and just passed on the mic. I think that's one of thing we should learn and practise from them, to count the blessing more often and share with each other. Although I don't know most of these brothers and sisters personally, but I can feel their joy and peace in Christ. It felt like one big family. That's what fellowship is all about. That's what so wonderful and joyful about Christmas. MERRY CHRISTMAS...

Zoom Zoom Zoom

I know most of you would probably think I'm not a natural sales character, but anyway I've got into this automotive sales industry. I work in Agincourt Mazda as a salesman now. I've started for about three weeks. Its been very tough since business is slow in the winter. Also, I think I've never taken such a big risk in my career path before. My salary is 100% commission based. No sales, no money. I've never been to a job where chances take such a big part of it. No matter how well my knowledge on the cars are, or how well my selling skills are, there's no guarantee on result. I guess sometimes, one got to step out of the comfort zone in order to grow, but I don't know if I've stepped out too far this time. I've never been so worried about my job. I think there are times when I'm about to collapse but God still showed me He's with me. However, it seems like He is watching me from a distance. He doesn't let me fall, but doesn't help me rise either. Everything seems so uncontrollable. I can feel how weak and vulnerable I am. I guess its a good opportunity to test on my faith to God.

I've to thank one of the sister in church for supporting me. After all these years in fellowship, I think I've forgotten how to pray or share with each other. We all think its impossible to have deep sharing in the middle of a crowded room, but she showed me its possible. When she suggested to pray together in the middle of the room, I was very surprised. Surprised because I've a flash of memory of how real fellowship should be, this is how fellowship was when I first came to this church. This is what I have missed or forgotten over the years. Thank you.

To the Road of Faith

Continuing from my last post... I was half discussing and half arguing with God last week. I asked him why He got me into all these and now He doesn't give me a job. A brother was asking me why I thought this was a plan God has for me. I think that was a good reminder for me. Ahttp://www.blogger.com/img/gl.photo.gif
Add Images I started looking for job, I started to rely on myself more and more. I have thought about going into sales for a long time, but never had the courage to do it. A few months ago, when I went to shop for cars with Ar Dee, I saw a lot of bad salesman. I thought if they can make a living out of it, I can too. Back then, I had two choices. One is to go into sales, the other is to keep trying to go into engineering work. Many friends are discouraging me from going into sales because of my introvert character, but I think I have improved alot through the years. On the other side, I don't remembered anything about engineering anymore, basically impossible to get back in. I had an interview with Toyota back then, but it didn't work out. I felt that God wanted me to go into sales because I get to meet a lot of people. Many opportunities to spread gospel instead sitting in front of a computer in an engineering job. Also, my training in car sales is also going to help me in terms of building rapport with new comers in church. There's many things in common in selling cars and spreading gospel. And the last reason is, the working hours will not affect my church's life.

I applied to quite a few dealers for the past few weeks, not many of them are getting back to me. I was getting disappointed. After arguing with God, suddenly the next morning I've got a call from Mazda. The manager said he just got my resume, but actually I sent that out over a week ago. He called me at 11:30pm and wants me to get there before 12:30pm. Thank God that it was my dayoff. Everything went smooth and the manager is willing to train new salesman.

I started my work at Agincourt Mazda this morning. Its a good dealership, the place is nice, the people are friendly. Amazingly, I actually enjoyed it. I haven't enjoyed working for the past few years. Although I have landed a job, but I think this is where the journey begins, to what I called "The Road of Faith". Salesman get paid based on 100% commission. Most of the client are basically referral. So if you guys know anybody who is interested in buying a car, please let me know. Its a very unstable job. But I think if God takes me to this path, He'll keep his promise and take care of me.

"So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
[Isaiah 41:10]

Lost...

I have taken a week off from work. Although I had a lot of free time, but I seemed to be really tired all the time and a little lost in my life. I am still quite lost in my career search, still lost in my spiritual path, still lost somewhere...

I was discussing about our fellowship's bible verse with a few B&S over the weekend. "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6" Someone questioned if we should change our bible verse every year to make B&S to remember God's word instead of just reciting every week without actually thinking about what it means. I have to admit that I don't think about the verse very often. I do recite the words deadly every week.

In the first year of Galilee fellowship, they picked this verse because a lot of the B&S are in the early stage of their career. A lot of them are hunting for jobs or still searching for opportunity to switch to a better job. We needed to rely on God and put our faith to the test. Now that our life stages are starting to change. Most of us already have a decent/acceptable job and focusing on different part of our life. Some of us might be starting to drift away from God as we start to rely more and more on ourselves. No matter what life stage we're at, I think this bible verse will still apply. So why change it?

I've been trying to change my career for the past few months. I have done my research, I have finish a course and also got my license. It seemed to me that God was taking care of everything. I trust that God will provide if I just follow his path. I even took up some serving at church because I have faith that God will give me a job that won't affect my serving at church. Now that I started to hunt for my new job, nothing is as smooth as before. It doesn't seems to be that easy after all. I'm starting to lose my faith. I'm starting to question if this is really the path God wants me to take. Did I really trust in Him with all my heart and not lean on myself? Did I acknowledge Him enough in my job search? Please pray for me.

Naive...

I think I have grown up in a very different environment than the people around. I grew up where people try to insult others and make fun of others. I grew up where people can say whatever they want and just take it as a joke. I grew up where I don't need to use very polite words to communicate. I grew up where I can just be extremely honest and straight to my friends. I do know that a lot of people around me cannot accept the way I talk. The way I talk is not friendly enough for them. But I always think my friends will eventually see the real me. I thought they'll eventually see that's the way I talk, I am not trying to hurt anyone. I thought they'll eventually accept me the way I am. But I realize I'm just too naive. May be many people around me have already left me or ignored me, many of them don't even consider me as a friend anymore and I don't even know it. I'm just fooling myself.

I think nowadays being friends together is a very complicated things. I always thought friends are friends, that's very simple. When your friends need help, you go help them; your friends have a gathering, you go join them; your friends want to chat, have a drink with them. But nowadays, people need to consider a lot of things before making friends with each other. Again, my friends have told me that I'm too naive. I guess they're right, but I still want to keep being naive. At least it'll save a lot of headache. I don't care if my friend have lied to me or hurt me. They're still my friends, unless they don't want to be friend with me anymore. I think making friends can still be very simple with a pure heart.

So Close, yet So Far

Philippians 4:4 "Rejoice in the Lod always, I will say it again: Rejoice!"

Had a bible study about Joyfulness last night in the fellowship. I realized that I had a very complicated mind last night and I simply cannot focus on the bible study. I am not having much "joy" in my life at the moment. Am I not satisfied with my life? Not really, may be a little. I am thankful to God about all He has given me. I am thankful that I was never lack of anything in my life. But when God show me or give me a hint that He's going to provide more, and I actually went in and try and get it. Everything seems to go smooth and almost within reach, but I couldn't reach them. Everything seems so close, but yet so far. Could it be a test of faith from God? Or is it just a trap of temptation from Satan? As a Christian, I can only tell myself that God is going to provide something better in the future. Just believe in Him with faith. But if I were a non-believer, I'll say this is just a way we comfort ourselves as a Christian.

In the bible study, it reminds me that I need to be thankful and satisfy with what I have, I need to have peace in my mind, I need to have a good relationship with God. But I found that its not easy to have these things in my mind. Its not something that I say I want it and it'll become part of your mind. Its not something I can just force myself to do logically. One of my devotions a few weeks ago remind me to rely on the Holy spirit instead of my own ability, experience God by submitting to him, not by logical thinking. And I am still trying to learn that.

I think the problem is starting to get serious, even affecting my driving. Every shift of gear doesn't seems to match. It feels like someone who just start learning how to drive manual. I am simply not connecting with my car. I guess I really need to spend some quiet time and reorganize my life.

Thorns

'The seed that fell among thorns stands for those who hear, but as they go on their way they are choked by life's worries, riches and pleasures, and they do not mature.' LUKE 8:14

We think we can...

Once in a while, we all try to do something we think we can do. This video is just too funny. I must share it with you guys.


Kid Slams Into Wall - Watch more free videos

Description of Video...
This guy tells his buddy that he can do anything he wants if he puts his mind to it. He gets all excited and says he really wants to run through the wall. Some much for that old saying.

Disability...

Throughout my life or most part of my life, I have been living pretty independently. Whatever problem I faced, I've learnt how to face or handle them. When people insult me when I was young, my mom always tell me it doesn't hurt (physically), let them talk all they want. That's why I don't care about gossip in the fellowship. When my mom died, and my dad married again, people tell me to live strong and study hard. So when I grow up, I don't need to rely on my dad or anyone. Everything that passed by me, I see them as "No Big Deal". People thinks that I don't care about anything, but really I don't think there's any problem so big that makes me worry till I collapse. I always take life as how it comes to me. However, I think this is causing me a disability in understanding other people. When people around me share their problem with me, I only know how to tell them that its no big deal. I can only suggest solutions. I can only tell them how to think from another perspective. But I am not able to understand their feelings, and I don't know how to comfort them. I think this disability will continue to affect me for a long time. I know that people say God can change one's character/ personality. I just need to keep praying until it happens. I am not doubting God's ability, but I don't see it happening anytime soon. May be I should be qualified for disability parking space.

Stressed out???

I always consider myself not easily stressed out kind of person, but unconsciously I'm not. Its actually not the first time I realize this. I'm just being forgetful. I guess I've been thinking about my career a lot lately and just don't want to worry about anything else. Any little trouble can easily explode me and fluctuate my emotions. There are times when you just want to get out of this world and just keep quiet and do nothing. Unfortunately I have no choice. God wants me to go through all these and learn from them, and become more mature. I do thank God that He has put a bunch of brothers and sisters beside me to support me and pray with me. I really want to say thank you to the one who helped me out during the difficult times. THANK YOU... I really mean it from the bottom of my heart. Where would I be if I didn't became a Christian and have the love and support from you guys?

Dead End...

I am basically faced with a dead end in my career path now. I am not learning anything from work, doing boring stuff everyday, or sometimes not doing anything at all 'cause there is simply not enough work. I don't see myself advancing anywhere in this company, not that I want to. I have to admit there are many good sides of my job though, no pressure from boss or customer, no overtime, lots of day off, good benefit, good pay for the kind of work I do. As Magna moves everthing to China, the job security is at risk. Eventually I'll need to find a new job, so why not do it now? I've always wanted to find a new job probably for the past year, just that I am too lazy to put much effort into it. Sometimes I would tell myself to quit the job and force myself to commit to the job hunting, but I simply don't have the courage to do it. Although I know God won't let me starve to death on the road, but I don't want to be anywhere close to that. For the past few weeks, I have been seriously thinking about getting into the field of car salesman. I know most of my friends think that I am not a sales kind of personality, but I think I'll do fine in it. I have done my research and everthing seems to be smooth. This field is easy to get in and lots of job opening. Just at the point that I decided to step in this path, a phone call rang to my surprise while I was still sleeping on my bed. The phone call is from Toyota. As my brain was still trying gather my consciousness together, I thought it must be one of the dealer that I applied a few weeks ago. Then I found out its actually from Toyota Manufacturing, an opening that I applied like half a year ago. Well, the position doesn't really interested me much, but Toyota is a great company to work for. So now I've got to slow down my path to become car sales, and reconsider my career. Sometimes I'm really confused of where God wants me to be. Anyway, I'll prepare for the interview and let God decide. If it doesn't work out, then I'll take the car sales path. So please pray for me that I can schedule my time well and prepare for this interview and pray that I'll rely on God on my search of my career.

The Second Mile

"If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles." (Matthew 5:41)

I remembered when I first came to this church, it was much easier to do the second miles back then. I think it was because everybody was doing it in the fellowship. Most people would do more than what it is asked for or demanded, and with joy and grace. I found that I am losing it. Actually, I lost it long time ago. "It is more blessed to give than to receive." (Acts 20:35) I am too familiar with this phrase, just not familiar with doing it. Its easy to serve close friends, but not so much to others. If my friend ask me to help decorate their wedding. I will try and give it all my best or even do more than what they asked for. But I don't know if I would do it to someone who is not as close to me. I didn't serve to receive rewards or whatever. But sometimes it feels that a lot of people are taking it for granted. It gets very discouraging. I might think they don't deserve it. But then I realize the problem is me, I am losing love. God please fill me with you love once again.

The end of one Passion

After six years of owning this 240sx, I finally sold it. To many people, a car is just a vehicle for them to get from A to B. But this car marks a very important chapter of my life. This car is the first manual car I owned. The car where I learned all the stick driving tricks, where I almost crashed myself into the curb from learning the heel and toe. The car that I spent so much money on and I always question myself whether I should keep putting money into it. This is also the fastest car I've owned, always giving me the temptation to rocket to 180km/hr in a matter of seconds. The car that always make me think about the ratio between the thrills and satisfaction from driving vs. the headaches to maintain the car, plus the money I invested, plus the risk of getting speeding tickets plus .....etc, but I can never come up with a conclusion. Most importantly, this car marks my passion for these cars.

Some people don't understand why people would spend that much money on a car. As for my case, why would I spend so much money on a 16 years old car.

1991 240sx (in good condition) $4000

Nissan Blacktop SR20DET turbo engine $3000

Suspension $800

Racing tires $800

The list goes on and on...

Speeding through the track in a car that matches your driving style, controlling the car as if its part of your body, the adrenaline you get from chasing other people's car, slamming the brake pedal at the right braking point, getting the perfect heel-toe at the end of a straight away and then kisses the apex of the turn, knowing that you've improved from the last lap...... PRICELESS

Its a very expensive toy. Yes, its bascially my toy car. I only drive it once in awhile, and may be a few track days a year, and then the car hibernate for the winter. I never regretted putting all these money into it. The only thing I regret is that I still haven't learn how to drift.

I have changed my mind between selling the car and not selling it for so many times, and then God decided it for me. With my current finicial ability, I simply cannot afford to keep this toy car. I know that all these money that I dumped into the car, I'll be lucky to even get half of them back from selling the car. But life moves on, I know that eventually I'll have to sell it. After so many time of trying to sell it, still no success. Then everytime I drive the car, I know that I am going to miss it if I ever sell the car, and my decision starts to shaken. Just when I was starting to give up on selling the car, then God open his path. After posting the classified for months with no success, suddenly a buyer out of nowhere offer me a price for the car. Although its nowhere close to my asking price, but I take it anyway. God was telling me, HE was the one that gave me all these in the first place. If HE wants to take it away from me, I am willing to give up this passion of mine. I sold the car at the last day of my parking rental, the last day before my license sticker expire. God always has the perfect timing.

As a Christian, I have to confess I have my weaknesses. Cars have always compete with God's position on my priority list. I probably thinks about my cars more than thinking about God's words. My passion for cars has pulled me away from God from time to time. May be after all, its a good thing to sell the car.

Taste of Persian

Last thursday, I had my first taste of Persian Cuisine. My co-worker recommended me to this restaurant called NORTH restaurant. The food is actually not bad, but not too many variety. We had aMirza Ghasemi (a mashed eggplant appetizer), a Greek salad, a Kabab Special (Combination of char-broiled tenderlion & Chicken). The weird thing is, they don't really have dessert, at least not on the menu.

Everyday deserves a chance

"This is the day the Lord has made. We will rejoice and be glad in it"

We sing this song all the time (actually may be in the Children ministry), but do we really mean it? Recently I started reading a book called Everyday deserves a chance. It reminds me of this song. Everyday day is made by God, and everyday is a brand new day. But too often we don't give it a chance.

Imagine driving your car to work this morning. You go down the street, but you feel that the car seems to be slower than usual. You thought may be it just need a tune up or may be its not warmed up yet. You keep driving. And then you go into the stop and go traffic. You are late for work and you're in a hurry. You slam on the gas and then slam back on the brake repeatedly. You thought you will get to work faster if you push hard on the gas, but it actually doesn't make a difference. When you finally got to work, you found out that you handbrake is still on. That's why the car seems so slow.

I know that most of you probably is not that stupid, driving the car with both the handbrake and brake on all the time. But is this the case how we treated our life? Too often our guilt for the sin and wrong doing we did yesterday drag on us like the handbrake. And then our fear or worry for the future stop us from going forward like the brake. So how are we suppose to move forward when you're pressing on the brake and pulling on the handbrake at the same time?

As a Christian, are we different from other people? Sometimes I think if being a Christian is not making a change in our life, we just move on everyday like anybody else, then what good does it make? Christian is not just a religion, its not just leading people to good, but its a way of life. With God's grace, our yesterday's sins are forgiven. His oversight removes our fear for the future. Although He doesn't guarantee our road will be smooth or straight, but He guarantee something better. He will be with us no matter where we go.

"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9

The question is, do you want to drive down the road with God?

First Post

Finally, I've started my own blog. Trying to set it up for months now, and never got the chance to start it. I think this will be a good platform to show my friends what's going on with my life. Its not just about cars. Although I'm crazy about cars, my priorities are starting to shift as life moves on. With my work schedule, its getting harder and harder for me to gather and chat with my friends, especially when I will be switching to night shift again.

I name the blog Driver's seat because I think life is like driving in a car. Life is driven by many different things. Sometimes we know where we are going, or sometimes we just follow the road with no destination in mind when we lost focus in life. There are many uncertainties and obstacles on the road that are out of our control. How we reach to it and handle the situation depends on the driver.

Let the journey begins......